Full Nest Empty Nest
midlife, parenting

The Fleeting Joy of the Temporarily Full Nest

Memorial Day weekend was the first time in six months that my partially empty nest was full again. My oldest came home to visit for the long weekend. I hadn’t seen him since he was last home in December. He lives in Wisconsin and we haven’t had a chance to go out there to visit him, nor has he had the opportunity to come home, until that weekend. We didn’t do anything exciting and that almost made it even more special. Just the normalcy of him being at home, along…

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scared of things that are out of my control
aging parents, midlife, parenting

Trying So Hard Not to Be Scared

I had a meltdown yesterday. It was the release of a day’s worth of trying not to give in to anxiety and fears that had built up subconsciously. The tipping point came when I accidentally pinched my finger in the hinge of the closet doors. It closed so hard on my skin that it caused an instant blood blister. I saw stars in that first intense moment of pain as tears rolled down my cheeks. I sat down on the nearby toilet seat lid holding my finger tightly. At first…

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Beat Down Negativity
midlife, personal growth

Beat Down the Inner Voice of Negativity

I have a pesky little voice of negativity in the back of my mind talking smack to me. I’d like to duct tape the mouth of that beeatch who resides in my head and spouts nasty, mean and hurtful negativity about me into my ear regularly. I can’t be alone here. I know there have to other women dealing with the inner voice of self-doubt and insecurity too. I wonder when she moved in? I don’t remember hearing that voice beat me down when I was nine years old or…

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Feisty Heroine in Menopause
midlife, personal growth

Can We Agree to Be Disagreeable?

I’m just being real. More and more. Just doing me. Are you like me and finding that midlife is making you feel less and less willing to fake being agreeable? It is an oversimplification (and also unfair) to chalk it up to hormones (or lack thereof). I promise you it’s not entirely menopause. I feel like there is a gravitational force yanking me in different directions. I can go the entire rotation from melancholy to gleeful, all in a day – sometimes all in an hour. And regardless of my…

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a menopause midlife decluttering
midlife, personal growth

Less Clutter, More Joy

Maybe it’s part of a midlife crisis, but I am hell-bent on less clutter, more joy in my life these days! I have never been happy about the clutter, but recently it’s been bothering me more than ever. It’s kind of like the polar opposite of the “nesting” instinct many of us felt when we were preparing for the arrival of a baby. Maybe this is an instinctual cleaning out of the soon-to-be-empty nest? I don’t think that I am de-cluttering for “the end” of life (I’m not that dramatic!),…

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main image for life after fifty page
midlife, personal growth

So? What’s real? What’s true? What’s next?

I’m waking up and it’s Chapter Two. In my “life after fifty”, I now occasionally catch sight of daylight and realize there is a shift happening in my life. But what do I do about these questions I’m searching for the answers to? I feel like the first 25 years of my life happened to me, rather than by me. I guess there were choices, but looking back now, it feels like the choices were made for me. I never really felt like I was making decisions for myself. I…

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