Have you ever thought about how connected your feeling of not deserving may be to what you are struggling to make happen in your life?
You are aware of what you want and yet you don’t feel empowered to make it happen. You think about it, dream about, even take actions toward it – but you get down on yourself and doubt it will ever happen. And so, it doesn’t.
Many of us don’t feel deserving enough to create and receive what we want to happen. We give up or give in because we don’t feel like we’re worthy of that goal, of that love, of that wealth, of that health, of that abundance.
Rewind your story.
Sometimes it’s rooted back to childhood. Possibly the subtle (or not so subtle) messaging you received as a child. That you were not measuring up. That you shouldn’t dream big. That you needed to be more realistic. That you weren’t capable, smart, strong, powerful enough to achieve what you desire.
Were you raised to think small. To think in limiting beliefs about yourself or maybe your entire family. Or maybe you were raised under the pressure of unrealistic expectations, which you feel you never met. Which lurks in the shadows of your minds even if those expectations were never aligned with who you truly are and what you genuinely want.
And so you’re left feeling like maybe the reason you can’t seem to reach your goals or have what you want is because you don’t deserve to have what you desire.
And maybe that feeling is accompanied by guilt and shame in a flashback to where you didn’t feel you measured up. To a time when you made what seems now like a poor choice, or took the wrong turn, or hurt someone, or felt ugly emotions like jealousy or envy of someone.
When you’ve questioned why you can’t seem to reach your goals, have you ever heard your inner critic whisper in your ear – I can’t have it because I don’t deserve it.
Unblocking that limiting belief.
Being able to receive wealth, health, success, the home you desire, the job you dream of, the peace, the freedom, the vacation, the good fortune – is NOT dependent on you being a deserving human being.
What does deserving mean, anyway? That you’ve been a good girl?
“If you suspect that, deep down, you’re not completely deserving of freedom, choice and abundance in your life… then this may be the very reason you’re struggling financially or are unable to achieve what you long for.” – Julie Ann Cairns, The Abundance Code
Let’s examine this more closely. Let’s look for truth (which is ALWAYS helpful when we’re wallowing in lack and self-doubt).
If it were true that only deserving people were able to reach their goals, live their dream life and have the success, money, health, the rest of us dream of… then the people who are receiving all of life’s abundance would be SAINTS! Right? They’d be walking around with a halo over their head!
They’d have to be those who have never made mistakes, never told a lie, never hurt someone, never cursed, never cheated, never took a wrong turn or made a poor choice.
And that’s just not the truth!!
Instead, we can see that the people who are able to achieve their dreams and goals and live their best life are definitely not saints! No judgments here, but let’s be real – they are mere humans like you and me.
They are imperfect and flawed and no more deserving than you!
The biggest difference is their mindset!
They believe in possibility. And they don’t dwell on being deserving.
They are not allowing shame, guilt and negative limiting beliefs about themselves stop them!
And the best news of all?
You can shift, change and improve your mindset!
“That which is holding you down can become a powerful force that raises you up.” – Michael Singer
Unlike many other aspects of your life and circumstances, the way you think can be shifted! (Can you tell I’m so excited about this that I’m shouting?!)
Getting your inner critic to simmer down and working through healing past issues that continue to surface and make you feel unworthy are where to begin the process of allowing what you desire to come into your life.
You DO deserve all that you dream of and work toward, no more or less than anyone else.
You have the choice to begin letting it in.
It won’t happen if you don’t also take intentional action – but without the mindset part, you will spin your wheels and not make the progress you desire.
Are you revved up to start getting your mind on your side and to digesting and believing that the abundance you dream of for your life is not connected to being deserving?
Step one is to dig through your memory and help yourself work through some of the hard stuff that comes up surrounding your youth and upbringing. Or maybe it was in your adult years that cultivated this lack of deserving. Past trauma, disappointments, or addictions that have led you to feel blocked when it comes to receiving love, money, health, freedom, and joy into your life.
You are worthy.
Decide to ramp up your self-care. Choose to unravel those deep-rooted emotions that may be stopping you from riding the abundance train.
Cheers to digging out the truth to uncover why you have that feeling of not deserving anything. You’re going to find it’s playing a part in preventing you from receiving what you desire! It’s not about whether you are deserving or not! Start believing that your dreams are available to you. – Marlene
Want to read more on this?
Here are a few posts that can help you get started on mindset work.
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