How can we find the bright side if we don’t feel in control of where we’re going?
Every shift in our lives is just a season. Nothing is permanent. Change is the constant.
I’ve referred to our journey as “the evolution of you” in previous blog posts and I think it’s good way to think about life, especially midlife.
We are ever-evolving. And we are never too old to grow.
Some of the turns in our evolution are difficult and painful, but when we come out on the other side of the dark (and we will) and look back, it always results in growth.
As we ride out the seasons of change that may be happening in our life, i.e. job transitions, kids leaving for college, menopausal funk, a drifting marriage, health challenges, aging parents – perspective is everything.
We can’t always alter the geography of the path (the ups, the downs, the sharp curves) but we can grab the wheel and climb into the driver’s seat.
You are in control of talking yourself into or out of how wonderful or awful the ride is.
“The more that you believe that you are in control of your life, your actions and your future, the happier and more successful you’ll be.” – Mel Robbins
You can talk yourself into being in the driver’s seat, steering to avoid the potholes when possible, accelerating on the up hills, hitting the brakes on the steep declines, and making the best of the rough terrain, or….
You can tell yourself you are the victim and allow yourself to be bouncing around wildly out of control, getting painfully bruised and beat up, riding in the dark trunk of the vehicle.
What’s it going to be?
I imagine you will choose, like me, to be in the driver’s seat and at the very least be able to see where you’re going.
The seasons and changes in your life are inevitable but facing them with the conscious decision to navigate the best possible course in front of you – to commit to living it fully, is success in and of itself.
It can be hard
You may have it harder than someone else, but those facing roads far bumpier than yours have achieved miraculous things in their lives. So why shouldn’t you?
And if we never know what the next season will bring, how big the next sinkhole in the road will be, or how gloriously abundant our next season might be, why not decide to live more fully right in this moment.
Fasten your seatbelt
Chase after the dreams you have. Be your authentic self. Speak your truth. Work on healing yourself.
Challenge yourself to find the bright side in the seasons – in your job transition, your child moving out, your marriage evolving, your health being challenged…
Enjoy the view
And as we look ahead at the road ahead of us, we can’t know for certain what will be on the other side of the hill (no pun intended!) but it is our life and what we do have control over is how we live each moment mindfully and as fully present as possible.
Always moving forward. Always reminding ourselves to get out of the trunk and into the driver’s seat.
Speaking to ourselves with kindness and compassion. Guiding ourselves when we feel lost in the dark to those pinholes of light that lead to the sunshine.
Go get it my friends! Go live it! Get in the driver’s seat!
Immerse yourself in gratitude and mindfulness for your current season…
Raise your glass full of hope and optimism and toast to the bright side and the seasons to come.
Cheers to you all rocking a bright side, self-love, driver’s seat Mother’s Day! (You deserve it because every single one of you has mothered someone in your life, whether you have children or not!) – Marlene
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